Human touch — hugging, hand holding, cuddling, and other outlets of physical touch are beneficial, health-wise, physically and emotionally. Research demonstrates that touch contains several health benefits for our physiological and psychological well being.
To understand this, we’ll start on the outside — with the skin. It’s our largest organ, covering about 20 square feet, which is about the size of a twin mattress. If somebody touches you, there’s pressure pushing on your skin at the point of contact. And just under the skin are pressure receptors .These receptors receive pressure stimulation, and send a signal to the brain. The brain in turns releases a variety of brain chemicals such as Oxytocin-for females and Vasopressin-for males.
This fascinating process is clearly visible with modern brain scan technology. We can see which areas of the brain “light up” and the exact time when these bonding hormones are released.
OXYTOCIN, VASOPRESSIN AND TOUCH For example, research has demonstrated numerous positive effects associated with physical contact and affection. Hugging induces Oxytocin, the “bonding hormone,” that’s known for reducing stress, lowering cortisol levels and most importantly increasing a sense of trust and security. According to one research project conducted at the University of North Carolina, women who receive more hugs from their partners have lower heart rates and blood pressure and higher levels of oxytocin. Oxytocin is a powerful hormone. When we hug or kiss a loved one, oxytocin levels drive up. This bonding hormone plays a huge role in feeling close to one another. (Here’s one more study How Dads bond with toddlers: Brain scans link oxytocin to paternal nurturing)
Social scientists have shown in many studies over the years that supportive touch can have good outcomes in a number of different realms. Consider the following examples: If a teacher touches a student on the back or arm, that student is more likely to participate in class. The more athletes high-five or hug their teammates, the better their game. A touch can make patients like their doctors more. If you touch a bus driver, he’s more likely to let you on for free. If a waitress touches the arm or shoulder of a customer, she may get a larger tip.Human Connections Start With A Friendly Touch.
The knowledge about the bonding hormone is old science. I recall learning of Louann Brizendine, M.D. over 10 years ago. He is neuropsychiatrist and offered compelling evidence of how quickly in a female these brain hormones can be released from simply hugging. Dr. Brizendine concluded:
Vasopressin functions in a similar way for males as Oxytocin does for females. Touch is like a language and you should learn how to use it.
MY GRANDCHILDREN AND TOUCH The lesson to be learned:
Take time to cuddle, hold hands, hug and kiss those you love and those you want to love you!
THE GOOD NEWS BAD NEWS OF TOUCH The release of these bonding neurochemicals when a person is touched is an involuntary process. These bonding neurochemicals are the cornerstone of the the “Physical Attraction” part of a healthy relationship. As you recall there are three parts of a healthy romantic relationship 💖: Physical Attraction 🔥; Friendship 🤜🤛; and Morals 😇.
The “Bad News ” is that a young teen couple dancing close, holding hands, hugging, kissing etc. will feel in “love” when in fact they are simply experiencing the power of touch.
The “Good News” is that I can wrestle, hug, kiss etc my grandchildren and trigger the same bonding chemicals!!!!!
I make sure I “touch” each of my grandchildren
at least 20 seconds each time I see them.
Even if I have to chase them!
You know what you need to do.
It’s too bad “touch” has such a bad connotaion in our society. 🙁
dr rick @ #docyoucan
OTHER EXAMPLES
CHRIST AND TOUCH Let’s take a quick look at how “touch” is used in Christ’s ministry. The power that others experienced while “touching” Christ are illustrated below.
And besought him that they might only touch the hem of his garment: and as many as touched were made perfectly whole.Matthew 14:36
Other examples of Christ’s powerful touch.
And Jesus answered and said, Suffer ye thus far. And he touched his ear, and healed him. Luke 22:51 Here is my favorite. And they brought unto him also infants, that he would touch them…Luke 18:15
There is something powerful that happens when we “touch” one another. Understanding how these “bonding hormones” work enrich are understanding concerning holding hands, hugs, kisses, and yes intimacy.
ENERGY MEDICINE AND TOUCH Several types of “energy medicines” use light or near-body touch techniques to influence the “energy field” that surrounds the human body. Healing Touch, Qigong, Quantum Touch, Jin Shin Jyutsu, and Reiki are examples of this type of therapeutic approach using a body touch method “to heal.”
NBA AND TOUCH In 2010 researchers Kraus MW1, Huang C, Keltner D. completed a study entitled: Tactile communication, cooperation, and performance: an ethological study of the NBA. The abstract for the article reads:
Tactile communication, or physical touch, promotes cooperation between people, communicates distinct emotions, soothes in times of stress, and is used to make inferences of warmth and trust. Based on this conceptual analysis, we predicted that in group competition, physical touch would predict increases in both individual and group performance. In an ethological study, we coded the touch behavior of players from the National Basketball Association (NBA) during the 2008-2009 regular season. Consistent with hypotheses, early season touch predicted greater performance for individuals as well as teams later in the season. Additional analyses confirmed that touch predicted improved performance even after accounting for player status, preseason expectations, and early season performance. Moreover, coded cooperative behaviors between teammates explained the association between touch and team performance. Discussion focused on the contributions touch makes to cooperative groups and the potential implications for other group settings. (PsycINFO Database Record)
I’m Dr. Rick Hawks a psychologist. I’ve provided mental health services for over 40 + years. I currently specialize in forensic psychology – so I spend a lot of time with murderers, rapists, and child molesters. Over the years, I’ve provided a variety of services to individuals and families with all types of problems including depression, anxiety etc. I’ve also successfully treated those with pornography and substance abuse problems. I’d like to share with you some of the “treasures” I’ve learned during my career using “#shrinktext Sessions.”
What Are #shrinktext Sessions?
I’m currently working on developing automated cell texts campaigns on various mental health topics. I refer to these cell text campaigns as “#shrinktext Sessions”. A #shrinktext Session is a series of automated texts delivered to your cell phone. Of course, I personally create these educational campaigns. In essence I’m trying to educate you via cell texts about a specific mental health topic. A #shrinktext Session can include: texts, memes, and videos. A list of current #shrinktext Sessions are at the bottom of this blog.
How Long Is A #shrinktext Session?
#shrinktext Sessions vary in length. Most sessions last 2 – 3 weeks. You will receive about one cell text a day. At the end of each session is a research survey. I would appreciate you completing the survey to help me improve the content.
How Much Does It Cost To Subscribe To A Session?
Currently the sessions are free. Of course, at times your phone carrier may charge a small fee for receiving a text.
How Do I Sign-up For A #shrinktext Session?
Simply text the “key word” to this number (202) 883 8885. I will provide you with the “key word” for each session. Once you text in the “key word” you will automatically begin receiving texts.
What Do I Do With Your Phone Number?
Your phone number is stored in a secure program provided by Skipio. I am the only one having access. I will not share or sell your number. My plans are to text you as new sessions become available.
How Can I Stop Receiving Texts?
You can opt out at any time by simply replying: STOP After replying STOP you will receive no more texts from my number (202) 883 8885 😥
Current DOCYOUCAN #shrinktext Sessions: Please subscribe to only ONE at a time. Once you’ve completed one session simply text the “key word” for another. Please share these campaigns with your family and friends- I’d love their feedback!
#shrinktext Session Name
Key Words
Description
Never Give Up
Never Give Up
Encourages you to “never give up” and keep trying. Contains 14 texts and last 2 weeks.
The Most Important Principle I Can Share
Most Important
Teaches the importance of “self-care”. Contains 22 texts and last 3 weeks.
I Have Worth
I Have Worth
Faith based session teaching how God views your worth. Contains 14 texts and last 2 weeks.
Five-to-Survive
Five
Importance of having resources. Lasts about 2 1/2 weeks.
Remember all you need to do to subscribe is text the “Key Words” to (202) 883 8885 an you will be automatically enrolled.
STRESS Stress is your body’s way of responding to any kind of demand. It can be caused by both positive and negative experiences. In 1966 Dr. Richard S. Lazarus defined stress something like: The condition or feeling experienced when you perceive that demands exceed your personal resources. Stress is a normal part of life.
When you feel stressed by something going on around you, your body reacts by releasing chemicals into the blood. The amygdala, an area of the brain that contributes to emotional processing, sends a distress signal to the hypothalamus. This area of the brain functions like a command center, communicating with the rest of the body through the nervous system so that the person has the energy to “fight or flee”. This is called the “stress response.”
Let’s try experiencing the “stress response” by just thinking of a stressful event. I bet you can imagine something in your mind some demand or stressor, right now that can trigger the “stress response.” Perhaps, speaking in public, meeting with your boss, talking to your spouse about money etc. Try it! Think of a stressful event and pay attention to your physiological reaction. Most of us can do this without ever leavung our chair!
Stress looks like this:
Stress occurs when your perception of the Demands outweigh your Resources.
STRESS AFFECTS HEALTH The human body is designed to experience stress and react to it. Prolonged stress causes wear and tear on your body – both physical and emotional. Prolonged stress can lead to:
Physical symptoms such as headaches, an upset stomach, elevated blood pressure, chest pain, sexual dysfunction, and problems sleeping.
Emotional problems such as depression, panic attacks, or other forms of anxiety and
INCREASE RESOURCES –REDUCE DEMANDS It is critical that you have sufficient resources to deal with the demands of your life. Simply stated, stress can be avoided by: Increasing resources or Reducing demands. Check out my blog “Five to Survive” or podcast “Five to Survive” to learn more about resources.
ONE TIP Remember – stress is when you perceive that you do not have the resources to deal with the demands. The key word here is “perceive.“
Let’s talk about gardening. Gardening is a resource to me but likely a demand for you! Obviously, the garden activity in and of itself is the exact same behavior for each of us – plant the seeds, pull the weeds, water the plants, etc.
How can the exact same activity be aresourcethat reduces stress for one person … and a demandthat increases stress for another?
It’s perception! In other words, it’snot the stressful event itself that makes the difference. What is most important, is how you perceive the stressful event.
Personal resources can always be increased by strengthening your perception of yourself.
The demands can always be reduced by changing your perception of the demand and its impact on you.
If you perceive something as stressful, your brain releases hormones into the blood and you will experience the “stress response.”
BALANCE THE SCALE Here it is, the one tip that can eliminate experiencing the “stress response” when confronting any stressful event.
Change your perception about your ability to deal with the demand and/or change your perception about the way the demand will impact your life.
The fact that “stress” occurs because of a perception, means that you can do something about it. You can train yourself (or you can be trained by a professional, if necessary) to change your perception or how you believe about yourself and your life demands.
HOW TO CHANGE YOUR PERCEPTION Changing your perception of a stressful event is ONE resource that always works in reducing stress! One common method of changing your perception of a stressful event is the use of affirmations.
POSITIVE AFFIRMATIONS Positive affirmations are statements you say to yourself, that help you to challenge and overcome self-sabotaging and negative thoughts:
about yourself and your abilities
and about the possible impact of a stressful event.
When you repeat positive affirmations often, and believe in them, you can start to reduce the effects of stress.
Sample affirmations include: “This too shall pass;” “One day at at time;” “I can do anything I put my mind to;” “Let go and let God;” “Tomorrow is another day;” and “It is what it is.” The best time to use affirmations for stress is AS SOON as as you realize that you are experiencing the symptoms.
Even if you don’t believe the affirmation, pick a favorite affirmation and begin by repeating it several times a day.
My favorite affirmation: Doc says: You can do hard things!
Check out the list of resources Affirmations For Stress Relief:
PERCEPTION IS REALITY I had a new intake with a male patient the other day. He was about 45 and had been battling a “porn addiction” for most of his life. He had been to several counselors, attended 12-step support groups, visited with clergy, etc. He claimed: “Nothing works!“
I said to myself- here I go again. After 40 years of this same old rhetoric I’m not sure I have the energy to reeducate him and teach him the truth about his core self – who he really is and what he is really capable of doing. Clearly many of the interventions he has tried simply reinforced his “thinking errors” – “I’m an addict. I can’t stop.” “I have a disease. I have to learn to live with it.” “I’m no good.” “I’ve tried everything.” “Nothing works.”
This is a common vicious cycle. 😪
DAILY LIVING As you go about living, your self-talk influences your behavior and the way you interact with others and see the world. Quite often thoughts aren’t realistic. In fact they maybe outright lies! Yet, we believe them and behave as if they’re true. These inaccurate thoughts we believe-in and live-by are referred to as “Thinking Errors” or sometimes “Cognitive Distortions. “
Thinking errors have been part of psychology for as long as I remember. (Which by the way is a pretty long time.) You may recognize some of the common thinking errors: All-or-Nothing Thinking, Overgeneralizing, Catastrophizing, etc (See: Web MD -Thinking Errors)
In recent years the field of psychology has identified “thinking errors” for specific populations.
Criminal Thinking Errors The 14-year-old that I recently saw in court the other day for repeated legal violations was sentenced by the judge to “Criminal Thinking Error Classes.” These classes focus on identifying and changing criminal thinking errors like “I am a victim… It’s not my fault…” or “I deserve to have this …. They won’t miss it.”
Sexual Thinking Errors In assessing child molesters and rapists we use common “sexual thinking errors” to determine the seriousness of an individual’s deviant sexuality. The more sexual thinking errors they have, the more concerned I am. For example, I administer a test with sexual thinking errors like: “Most girls secretly like to be raped” or “Having sex with a child will make us closer.” The client marks whether or not they believe the statement to be true. Believe it or not, I’ve had 12 and 13 year olds answer “True” to questions like these. (Illustrates the power of pornography – a topic for another blog.) THE POWER OF EVEN 1 OR 2 THINKING ERRORS It has been my experience that ANYONE with an ongoing unwanted behavior e.g. addiction, depression, anger, panic attacks, suicide ideation etc. has in part one or two “thinking errors” that assist in maintaining the unwanted behavior.
Like a Door Hinge
Let’s compare a “thinking error” to a “door hinge”. A hinge is a jointed or flexible deviceon which a door subsequently depends. Most hinges are made of steel because of the weight they carry. Similarly, a “thinking error” is a jointed device that connects your “daily behavior – the door” with your “core self – the wall.” The hinge – “thinking error,” is the point on which your unwanted daily behavior subsequently depends.
Here is a quick example, I like to run now days. It’s a great resource for me. (See: Five to Survive). I remember years ago running 1 or 2 miles and feeling tired. I use to have these thinking errors “I could never run 5K” and “Bodies aren’t made to run a 5K.” As a result of these thoughts – I never ran a 5K. One year my sister-in-law signed me up to run a 5K. I thought no big deal, when I get tired I’ll just walk. I ran the whole way! ✨ I couldn’t believe it! In recent years I’ve been running half marathons. (I still have trouble wrapping my mind around actually running 13.1 miles.) The old thinking errors of “I could never run 5K” and “Bodies aren’t made to run a 5K” are now gone.
Just imagine what your reality would be like if you actually believed thoughts like:
“I’m no good.”
“I hate my husband.”
“No one would ever want to marry me.”
“All men want is sex.”
“I’m a bad mom.”
“I would be better off dead.”
“I can never change.”
“There is no God.”
Stuck on an Escalator Watch this video. In the comment section of this blog answer these questions:
What are the “thinking errors” that keep these guys stuck on the escalator?
What are the results of them believing these “thinking errors?”
Although the video is funny, as a psychologist I see people every day “Stuck”- stuck doing porn, stuck doing depression, stuck being suicidal, stuck doing anxiety, etc. Ask yourself: What escalator am I stuck on?
You change a thinking error – You change your life. NOTE: Certainly I’m not suggesting that all behavior is caused simply by thinking errors. Obviously, there can be many factors that contribute to an unwanted behavior. What I am saying is that “thinking errors” are at least part of maintaining the unwanted behaviors. One key to your happiness will include recognizing and replacing thinking errors. Maybe I should write a blog on “Fixing Thinking Errors?”
Doc: You Can Do Hard Things....
(C) 2018 all rights reserved
Well, July 4, 2009 I ran my first 5K at 55 years old. The North Ogden 5K was supposedly a very hard run – has lots of hills. So on the morning of July 4 at 7:00 I was on the run. I wore a chip on my shoe for the organizers could accurately measure my time. In the end- I took 3rd in my division-55 and older (Don’t be too impressed –there was only 5 in the division); 174th out of 418 racers. My final time was 28 minutes and 40 seconds. But none of that really matters to me-most importantly, I ran the race and I finished it!
And the XIII World Boy Scout Jamboree in Japan had just begun. Sitting in our tents at the foot of Mt. Fuji on Asagiri Heights, most of us, heard the mobile loudspeakers begin to blaze: “Prepare for evacuation. All sub-camps requiring evacuation , get ready. Buses are on the way.” 16,000 Scouts had to be evacuated for 48 hours. It was the summer of 1971. I had just turned 17. Our camp had to be evacuated. They asked for a couple of volunteers to remain behind to watch our equipment. I volunteered.
The Rain Came
We were joking around in the tent as a little river of water began to run through. We decided we’d better go out and dig a trench around the tent to direct the water elsewhere. By now the clouds were gray, the wind was blowing and the rain was a down pour. How could we have forgotten to dig the trench around our tent? We were scouts! Scouts are always prepared right?
Well, not this time and not for a typhoon.
STORMS OF LIFE
I’m convinced, after 40 years of working in the mental health field, one of the greatest obstacles facing each of us is our ability to cope. We fail to “dig the trench” before the storm comes. 😢 The storms of life will find each of us. We will either be prepared or we will not be prepared.Hard Times Ahead It is almost certain that as we talk about future life storms, we will talk about the importance of being financially and temporally prepared. We will ask questions like, do you have enough food, money, water, etc. That isn’t wrong of course, but if the discussion stays focused only on building home storage and finances 👉 you 👈 my friend will NOT be prepared emotionally for your storm!
As a Psychologist
As a psychologist with thousands of hours with patients, I’ve developed a new understanding of this scripture “Men’s hearts failing them for fear...” Luke 21:26 . I believe “men’s and women’s hearts fail them” when they do not have sufficient coping resources to deal with their storm. As a result, they experience depression, anxiety, nervous breakdowns, and unfortunately suicide.
HOPE
On the bright side, those who have sufficient “coping resources” make it.👍 The analogy I like to use is “Emotional Emergency Preparedness Kit.” You are probably familiar with the concept of a 72 Hour Preparedness Kit. This kit contains the basics: food, water, matches, etc. (What to Pack in a 72 Hour Kit). This kit is to be used during a natural disaster.
Emotional Preparedness Kit Well, if I was your psychologist, the first question I would ask you would be “What do you have in your Emotional Emergency Preparedness Kit?” I would then explain that this kit contains coping resources – emotional resources necessary for you to survive your storm. The principle of “self-reliance” applies to both preparedness for “emotional” and “natural” disasters. There are clearly several items that should go into your Emotional Emergency Preparedness Kit. As a psychologist I’d recommend you store-up.
COPING RESOURCES
Characteristics of Coping Resources
Here are some observations about coping resources:
Coping resources are someone, something, or some activity that strengthens you. 💪 A resource has a positive influence on your personal life. It brings hope.
Coping resources change from time to time. What might be a resource one day may not be a resource another day. A resource may not be available or simply not be effective the day you need it. For example, running used to be one of my favorite resources. Now, with age I swim more and run less.
What works as a coping resource for one person may be a stressor for another. For example, gardening is one of my most effective resources. For you there is a good chance that gardening is a stressor.
The need for coping resources vary depending on the expected stress. Some days you may need 7 or 8 coping resources because of all the stress. On other days you may need only 1 or 2. For example, on Saturdays when I work in my garden 1 or 2 resources are plenty. However, on days I get a subpoena to go to court, I like to have prepared with 4 or 5.
A coping resource should be “legal” AND “be consistent with your morals and faith.”
Most important, is the coping resource must work for 👉 you 👈!
FIVE TO SURVIVE You need five coping resources in you Emotional Preparedness Kit to survive your storm.
FINAL THOUGHTS When you’re looking for emotional coping resources don’t look too hard. Often you’ve already experienced them or you have had an impression of what might work. If all you are doing is taking medication. Count …
It’s “1”.
One is not five.
You need five to survive.
Feelings of being overwhelmed and depressed will occur…
when you have emotionally prepared for scattered showers,
but you are facing a typhoon!
Back to the Typhoon
We made it through the typhoon along with most of our equipment. The trench we initially dug eventually turned into much a larger ditch. Before it was over, there was a virtual river running through our camp. Holy Cow- did it ever rain!
Doc: You Can Do Hard Things....
(C) 2018 all rights reserved
If you are prepared you shall not fear.
Other ways to experience “Five-To-Survive”
Shrinktext Session– Receive daily cell text explaining the content. About 2 weeks in length. Simpley text FIVE to my cell text number 202.883.8885
Podcast
Facebook Life
Please share with your friends and family! – The Doc
MY GRANDCHILDREN AND TOUCH
